While our children have been little, everything was easier. We have always thought about them when choosing the holidays because we all know that if the children have a good time, we will be great. But now … our little ones measure more than us, they have their own ideas that seem a thousand times better than ours and, in many cases, we have gone from being their heroes and accomplices to someone who is always against them, it seems that we speak different languages. What has happened to our children? How can the relationship have changed so much? They feel like adults, they begin to make their own ideas, they demand more personal space, and they begin to develop the feeling of the tribe by multiplying their social relationships. It is a stage of discovery of one’s psychological identity as well as that of individual autonomy. They want to be treated like adults, but they often shy away from the responsibility to be so. We parents, on the contrary, still see them as children, we find it difficult not to interfere in their personal space because we do not see them mature enough, and we want to continue protecting them as if they were children. So do not worry, it is normal that there are complicated situations between parents and children. The main problem is not so much that this happens (sooner or later it will happen) but rather the search for new and appropriate solutions at the moment.
Family vacations begin to be enjoyed from the moment you start preparing them looking at destinations, activities or at least that is how it should be, because we are talking about that time of disconnection, rest and harmony that we have been waiting for almost a year for all of you, your children. But… where are we going? What do we do? It is time to put ourselves in your shoes. You have to choose an unforgettable vacation for the whole family and they have a lot to say. Think about what you would least like to do on vacation and try to imagine how you would feel if they forced it on you. If you do not agree with them you will ruin their holidays and surely yours, in addition to having lost a unique opportunity to enjoy complicity with your child in a magical moment such as family vacations. We give you some tips to make everything easier.
Holidays with your teenage children
Take a look back. Try to remind yourself about your age, but don’t focus on the things you did, but on how you felt. Adolescence is a moment of transition between childhood and adulthood that generates confusion for both parents and children. Maybe if you remember that feeling, you can put yourself in your children’s skin more easily.
Talk to them. It seems logical, but many times, parents sin by not talking to our teenage children in a clear way. Do they want to be adults? Well, talk to them as such, so they can see your ideas and the reasons why, as well as explain theirs.
Divide the time. It is possible that parents and children want to make different trips, but you can distribute the time in an equitable way, so that everyone can enjoy, even if you have to give up a little. A good idea is to look for family adventure vacations in nature that include activities such as canyoning, via ferrata, rafting and that usually appeal to both parents and children. In these types of trips with teenage children, you will experience moments when there is no space to think about the flurry you have had with your child for being late home or for not picking up his room.
Respect their times and spaces. Until four days ago they sought to be with you at all hours, instead now they cry out for their territory. Well, give it to them and they will give you yours and thus begin to be responsible for the management of their time. As long as it is logical, you will all win.
That they share with other kids their age. Adolescence is the stage that involves the emergence of the affective and abstract capacity to feel and develop emotions with their peers. The feeling of belonging to an urban tribe is increasing as well as their need to meet new people with whom to share. Do not deprive them of it, and thus you will not deprive yourself of those deserved vacations for the whole family.
Stop being an adult. There always has to be someone who puts the point of sanity, and that must be the adult, but once all your vacations are agreed, try to enjoy like your teenage children. Disinhibit yourself, jump, dance, run, scream, sing … enjoy 100% that is why we are on vacation.